2009: So long, and thanks for all the fish!
Okay, clearly I have no set goals or plans. While I, personally,am more than happy to float along without a plan or goal, I realize that this is bad, because I will continue to do so indefinitely. So, I have learned to love plans, set goals, etc, etc, etc.
Plan: Watch Shrek tonight. (Kidding! Not what I mean by life plan.)
I am sorry to subject you to the life plans of Grace, and that I don't have something more original or funny to write (like perhaps talking about shoveling a foot of snow in Buffalo this past week) but this has to be written down. Goals must be written for this woman, or they are vapor and air.
Plan: Get back on track with food. I have a love-love-hae-love relationship with food. I love to cook and I am good at it; I love to eat; my body loves it when I eat; my body shape...not so much. I have long ago come to terms with the fact I am built to survive a famine and participate in rough-and-tumble extreme sports. I will never be like my sister, skinny as a rail, flat as a board, and a size two on a bad day. But, I can be healthier than I am now. So, out go the carbs (in solidarity with my Dad who has been BAD BAD BAD with his diet and lo! behold! diabetes!) and in come the veggies and better planning.
Plan: Budget better. Vor and I are kind of still used to living in the house we were renting, with no expenses really, and we could do prety much whatever we wanted. Dinner out? Great. Lunch out? Even better. Starbucks? Does anyone survive without it? Now we are homeowners, with a mortage, paying back our school loans. Just the sight of my medical bill from my little fiasco (still on going thank you very much) had Vor's teeth grinding and me bursting into to tears. Brutal. And we have good health insurance. So, budget. Make my tea at home, pack my lunch, try to figure out a way to bring my lnch to the courthouse sometimes, and so on. Do I want the boots? Yes. Need? Sigh.... no. Do I want the watch? Yes. Need? Well... maybe. That's one I'll start saving for.
Plan: Manage. I will manage myself better at work, get a better grip on the people I am managing, and manage my emtoions and stress. Why do I cry all the time now? I never used to cry. This crying thing is awful, miserable. I don't wanna. I had a great meeting/conversation with my supervising attorney, an dI think I am getting a better handle on this job thing.
That's right, I said it. At the end of 2010, Vor and I are going to enter into negotiations re: reprodction. I don't meannegotiations in the biblical sense, I mean in the face to face talkign sense. I can't say that I'll be anymore enthused about the idea then, but, who knows. I held Baby H for a loooong time last night. She is still around, and still a cutie, and still giving joy while she is here. Didthe baby holding jump start the biological clock? Nope. In fact, it was like taking a hammer to the clock. But, maybe. I know if I don't ever, I will hate myself, so even if I don't want to, I must. Comprehend? Good.
I have not had enough coffee/tea yet. This must be fixed.
Climb Mountains. Fear Sharks.
4 days ago