Sunday, November 30, 2008

Being Ornamental

My favorite ornaments on the Christmas tree:

1. The American flag heart, for remembrance.

2. The lollipop, because it's candy.

3. The cupcake, because it's from my mom's Christmas tree when she was little.

4. The spaceships, because Vor and I are cool nerds.

5. The purple balloon, because it's weird.

6. The starfish, because I pulled it off the rock on a beach myself.

7. The weird cylinder, because its just so retro.

8. The wedding bells, because my niece Prada gave them to us.

9. The sparkly beaded ball, because it's sparkly.

10. The glass bells, because they came from my dad's tree when he was little.


Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Two Random Facts

1. My mother works at a zoo in Florida. She was promoted today to the position of "turtle herder." I am not joking. Apparently, she chased (I guess some turtles can actually move fast enough that you need to chase them) a turtle around its area today while she was holding a snake that kept wrapping itself around her wrists like handcuffs. (insert bad joke here)

2. I confess. I went to see Twilight with Vintage on Tuesday night. And you know what? It was a good time. A baseball game never looked so good. And If you don't know what I'm talking about, go read the book.

Just Thought I'd Let You Know

Walking through crunchy orange, red, and yellow leaves, holding Vor's hand, knowing we are going to go home and have homemade spaghetti sauce waiting, and smell the baking pies in the oven.

My favorite time of year.

Challenge of the Day

It is officially Thanksgiving break, and where am I? Snuggled up with my husband? Making one of the two pies I promised for the Thanksgiving table? Putting up the Christmas tree?

Nope. I am still in miserable Bloomington, with the miserable law school. See, I have a hearing today. Now don't get me wrong--I am pretty sure that the best thing I could be doing is staying here to help this guy. He needs the help, and he has really gotten the short end of the stick.

The problem?

Sick. No voice. Faint. Dizzy.

How do you conduct a hearing with no voice?

Monday, November 24, 2008

Thanks, But I'd Rather Slam My Hand in the Door

Description: How Law School Makes You Feel.

1. Like you are underwater, with a straw barely sticking up above the water. Also, it's windy outside, so there are waves constantly overflowing into your straw. You get just enough air not to drown.

2. Like you need to wear a helmet.

By Someone, I Mean My International Law Professor

When someone hands you 100 pages of reading that you need to be able to explain to the classroom at large, and that you is me, you panic.

Then, you relax a bit because that someone promises to send an email drastically reducing the amount of necessary reading.

Then, you enter into a swearing fit because their idea of "drastically reducing" the ridiculous amount of reading was to require people to "skim" certain sections.

However, because you, aka me, are on call, you do not get to skim.

You get to read all 100 pages.

Oh, and someone may also make you crazy by adding an additional fifty pages of reading the day before, in class.

I will never finish this.

In other news, I have a hearing on Wednesday, the day before Thanksgiving, that no one is prepared for. And my other Clinic clients have gone crazy again. And exams are starting soon.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Give In

I am giving into temptation.

I know. No self control. Just can't help myself. Irresistible.

What is that I am doing, you ask?

I am breaking out the Christmas plates. I'm playing Christmas music while I do it too. The Christmas tree is getting set up next weekend, so, well... I mean, all that decorating in one week would be overwhelming, right?


Tuesday, November 18, 2008

You Can't Make Me Pay Attention!

I. Hate. Secured. Transactions.

It is fifty minutes of hellish lecturing, with a sprinkling of cold calls. It is as boring as laying face down on a carpet and counting fibers. I went to law school to AVOID math, not do more of it in class.

The teacher is teaching the course backwards. Literally, we started at the end, and now we are getting to the penultimate question--"What is a secured transaction?" Really, maybe we should have started with that. Maybe.

Also, there is this guy--there's always this guy, right?--that asks about five long winded questions a class, and then giggles after each question. He also giggles throughout our professor's answer.

I am not a giggling person.

In other news, I have clients who cannot pay attention.


Monday, November 17, 2008


My family... they're just classic.

So here, have a classic moment or two:

1. My niece finally admits that it is not likely she ever date Nick Jonas.
2. Nephew #1 can actually rest his chin on top of my head, and hits on a girl at his "fight class" in front of me.
3. Nephew #2 makes me a giant poster. GIANT. POSTER.
4. Nephew #3 is up to my chin now, when informed that he is a cute, replies in a matter of fact, long suffering manner that he is fully aware of this problem.
5. My brother in law tried to go to a formal event in camo overalls and a tie. My sister almost had a melt down.

It's not funny on paper... but that's because you didn't see me trying to get my family to guess the name of the band Def Leopard without making a sound.



It really does induce strange things. See, e.g. the constellation on my face. It also brought on the extreme, well, ahem... sassyness... that my patient husband has put up with for the last few weeks.

Okay, seriously? I have been downright hostile. And I apologize.

But for some reason, it all vanished while I was in Buffalo. Yeah, my clinic clients still bothered me, and yeah, the weather was miserable, but there is nothing like my niece and nephews to lighten the mood.

Mirable, (yes, that is a word, and I adore it) it all stayed vanished when I came home. All I could do was smile at Vor, hold his hand, and snuggle up. Bliss.

There is no vanquisher of stress like a husband who reads in bed with you while you fall asleep.


I am on the internet, googling the nearest Seattle's Best Coffee, because while I am not interested in their coffee, I am interested in their Very Chocolatey Mocha With Whip Cream And Chocolate Sauce And Little Slab O' Chocolate, thank you very much.

See, now imagine that with the luscious whip cream and chocolate sauce I was talking about.

Can you spell craving?

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Snow and Other Musings

I leave tomorrow for the great, snowy, abandoned, and abandoning Buffalo.

I am ready for some time with some cute kids (aka, my nieces and nephews) and my sister and brother-in-law. I am NOT ready for the possibility of snow.

I am also not ready to leave Vor. I've seen him one day since he's been back. In about two weeks time span, we will have seen each other twice. I thought marriage was supposed to fix this problem?

Sunday, November 9, 2008


Several glasses of wine and a party later....

I can reclaim my husband today. I'll be able to pick him up at baggage claim, as long as I have the proper documentation to show that he, in fact, belongs to me. You know, that little baggage claim tag they give you? (ahem)

Did I mention that I am relieved to see him again?

Saturday, November 8, 2008


After my post detailing the ridiculous things that happened, I thought I was done.


The alarm went off at random points throughout the night, ensuring no sleep. I got lost in my own city this morning on the way to the exam. Thank God Vor has a Blackberry that can access a map.

Oh wait, that implies that a map will help. Because the building was NOT at the address that was on my admission ticket.

I am driving to Velvet's house now, and having some wine. Red. Now. Please.

Friday, November 7, 2008

To Vor, Love Me

Dear Vor,

You're in Boston, and I miss you.

I will bunch up all the pillows and the blankets next to me, but it just isn't the same.
I will talk to you on the phone, but you sound far away.
I will look at your picture, but you don't look back.
I will make a pot of tea, but only wash one cup afterward.
I will go see Vintage, but it's more fun with you.

I will imagine a kiss, but I can't wait for a real one.


Lose My Mind

I left the house at 7:30 this morning. I went downtown with Vor, and I sat in the Border below his law firm and worked while he worked.


I needed to email documents to my supervising attorney at the Clinic. My internet wouldn't work, wouldn't work, wouldn't work. I called the T-Mobile people, who made it work.

Vor interrupted my MPRE studying for a lovely lunch.

Then I did an MPRE exam that was a complete failure. And the man sitting next to me in the Borders fell asleep and snored.

I took Vor to the airport to go see his twin sister. This induced a meltdown, for no apparent reason. I just can't help myself sometimes.

I got home, thinking I would study a bit more and relax, only to discover our alarm--which never does anything, because it is not activated--was going crazy. Who knows where the codes are? Vor, on the airplane. The landlord in some strange foreign country. The landlord's wife, who was as clueless as me.

Thank God for plane delays...Vor called just form the plane as meltdown #2 was in progress. After a few circuitbreaker tries, all was well.

Now I just need to pass this exam.

I swear I will be less grouchy and whiney after this over.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

So Call Me a Whiner, I'm Just Venting

Top ten signs that it is not a good day:

1. You find yourself curled up in bed with an exam book.
2. You must continually leave the bed to answer the phone calls from your crazy clients, who have all just done really stupid things (I am an intern at the school's legal clinic).
3. The guy leading the cycling class was either hitting on you or telling you that you suck. Either way.
4. You can only think about cookie dough. And chocolate. And cookie dough and chocolate.
5. You are pretty sure there is an actual scratch on your eyeball. One that requires a lengthy and expensive visit to the eye doctor.
6. Your husband says, "I really have no idea when I'll be home." (Not his fault)
7. It's seventy degrees outside, but your feet are so cold that they are almost blue.
8. Your family calls to pick a political fight.
9. Your family calls AGAIN to pick more political fights.
10. You give in to #4 and create chocolate chip cookie dough. And now, you must not eat the dough or the cookies.

Sheesh. I'm going to meet Vor for dinner.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008


I have this nasty little thing called the MPRE on Saturday. It's the ethics part of being admitted to practice law.

It really is a sad comment on what an ethics exam is when you get this advice:

Attorney I Work With: "MPRE, huh? Pick the second best answer."
Me: "What?"
Attorney: "I mean, an answer that seems wrong and unethical to you, but not too unethical. It's never the one that leaves you lily white."
Me: "I feel dirty."
Attorney: "Yeah, I wanted a shower after I figured that one out."

On that note, where is my Purell?

Eavesdropping Makes you Laugh

Ever try it (unintentionally)? It really is good for a laugh.

I was strolling outside in the yellow and red leaves when I caught a snippet of a conversation that made me laugh.

Girl 1: "I don't know, I walked outside this morning, and I was just expecting...CHANGE."
Girl 2: "Like what kind of change?"
Girl 1: "I don't know! Just CHANGE! Anything from a dime on the ground to the sky being green!"

Okay, maybe you had to be there, but it was funny.

Of course, the most classic conversation I've ever overheard was this one, from two girls one row ahead of me on an airplane:

Girl 1: "Chernobyl....Chernobyl...What is that? It sounds really familiar..."
Girl 2: "I haven't heard of Chernobyl. It must be like Barnes and Noble. "

I planted my face into my tray table at that one.


Pretty incredible stuff tonight.

I came home from class, and desperately wanted to go to bed.

But really, where do I want to tell my kids I was when he was elected to be the next president? Not asleep for sure.

So I am awake, much later than I usually am.

I'll sleep well.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Makes me wanna...

Having left over food makes me miss the dog.

Seeing giant posters of an adorable puppy for the movie "Marley & Me" makes me miss the dog, and makes me want a puppy.

The calendar of cute golden retrievers we have in our kitchen is not helping with either of the aforementioned items.

You must think I'm crazy. I understand. I should just get over the dog. He was suddenly and unexpectedly sick, and he has gone to a better place. I was really attached though... When Vor and I first started dating, Jekyll was a given part of life. I thought I was marrying Vor, and getting the dog too. (Oh please, don't take it like that. The dog had nothing do with why I married Vor.)

I guess it was just a lot of life changes, all at once.

Here, have some pictures.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Cake Summons

Remember that pretty pink cake I made for my mother in law?

She sent us home with a giant piece of it.


I'm sure someone else out there understands. Right?