Monday, June 29, 2009

Bad Ant

I'm in a routine (rut?). I get up, bright and early, go to the gym, go to class, study, come home, make dinner, lightly study.

I'm in such a routine that I never bothered to check my schedule this morning until the gym, after the shower, after breakfast, after getting all my books ready to go. I HAVE NO CLASS TODAY. God. I could be sleeping, but nooooooo, I can't check a stupid piece of paper the night before when I'm on automatic pilot.

So with all my spare time, I have a confession.

May and June are chaotic months. The last two days in May are the birthdays of a niece and nephew (Blossom and Brick--no, not twins, my brother is just a really good planner), then June is my birthday, my brother's wedding anniversary, my sister's birthday, my aunt's birthday, my nephew Jedi's birthday, the anniversary my grandma died, my nephew Jeter's birthday, and my sister in law's birthday.

At least Christmas is consolidated into one, no?

So amidst the bar studying and all the other birthday chaos... I was a bad aunt (or ant, as my they like to call me). Somehow, I missed Jeter's birthday. I was studying all day, came home, and just fell onto the couch, and never really moved. I had a nightmare about missing his birthday, then woke up and realized I really DID miss it.

So I called, and of course, like a true 12 year old, he didn't care.

I am, however, terrified to call my sister. Help?

Bad, bad, bad ant.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Dear Party Girl in Bar Class

Dear Party Girl in Bar Class,

I know. The bar review sucks.

Oh, wait, you say... it doesn't? That's because, my dear, when I say the bar review, I mean studying to take the bar and become a lawyer. You mean going to every bar in the trendy part of town, sampling all the beer, and then going to shady parts of town and sampling their shots.

Please stop coming in and sitting next to me and smelling like drink and lavender soap.

Really, that issue is secondary to this one: your apparent inability to control your allergies.

Stop the sneezing, sniffling, constant sucking of whatever liquid is in your nose back up. Use a tissue. Use allergy drugs. Or I will use duct tape.

Also, your sneezes echo through the entire room and make us all wince. I can only imagine what the people who are watching these next week (taped version) think. That there is a small animal being squeezed against its will? That as we squeeze it against its will, we are pushing every last iota of air out of it? I'm not sure. Maybe I'll ask them.

So, in summary: Mouthwash. Allergy medication. Tissues.


The Girl Sitting Next To You Who Just Purchased Duct Tape

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Distraction, Thy Name is Dog

I have a hugely impressive schedule, mostly due to the hugely impressive (oppressive?) amount of work I have to get through.

I've worked 16 hour days in my former life as a sales girl / mechanic. Draining. I've worked lots of 10 and a few 12 hour days in the legal world. Also very tiring.

Working anywhere between 8 and 12 hours on studying for the damn bar exam is so much worse. Not quite sure why. Just is.

Also, now reduced to incomplete sentences.

Anyways. We went to a friend's wedding this past weekend (oh my God! I left the house! panic ensues! how will I possible get all my work done if every waking hour is not devoted to this pursuit! what is the down time you speak of? etc.) and afterwards, collected their dog, and headed back home. See, while they are frolicking on a beautiful island, I am frolicking with their dog (not to be confused with detour, for anyone out there who is thinking about agency and partnership).

Since Ms. Thing has been here (well, that's what I've been calling her, for no apparent reason, though when I say it, it usually comes out as miz thaaang) my life has gone something life this:

Wake up. Pet. Pet. Love and affection. Study. Pet. Pet while study. Study while pet. Hugs please. Flash card while throwing tennis ball. Pet. Pet.

I'm kind of hoping all the petting and pathetic eyes being made at me are the reason why I just did so miserably on this particular set of property questions.